This is probably a subject I should shy away from because if my husband reads this I am in for some serious ear lashing. However it's something that isn't often addressed and yet does play a factor in an ITP patients life.
So let's talk about sex? Or if my husband was speaking he'd probably say "what sex"?
Let's be real I'm a mum, working more than 40 hours a week, been married for 5 years and have been with my husband for over 13 years therefore like most married couples with children we probably aren't doing the deed as much as we should. I believe being a parent generally makes having a sex life difficult, you cannot be spontaneous and live in the moment. In order to have sex it needs to be scheduled in. This generally means organising a babysitter which doesn't happen very often or having to stay up really late until the little one has gone to sleep and by that time you have either fallen asleep yourself or are struggling to keep your eyes open - not really sexy material. However believe it or not we use to make this work.
Now let's fast forward to living with ITP. Yes it gets much worse from here. I believe most ITP patients would agree that one of the symptoms of this condition is chronic fatigue. Basically you feel pretty freaking tired, drowsy and irritable majority of the time - which I do not believe are the ingredients to put someone in the mood for some oh-la-la. Some days I literally fall asleep as soon as I get home because I am that buggered from a day at work. So the staying up late to get some bow-chicka-wow-wow is pretty much scrapped, see ya later, not happening. My husband use to try to wake me but he has since learnt not to wake a sleeping giant.
It's not that I'm not interested or that I do not find my husband attractive because trust me he's got it going on. I even love when he walks around the house thrusting his hips (this is his signal to let me know he is in the mood - very subtle I know). It's just that I am actually really tired and I am struggling to find the time to make it work. We do our best to put our son to bed early however it's like he has a sense and will not allow any of that kind of activity to take place, so majority of the time we fall asleep before our son does then wake up the next morning like WTF happened? We even do the whole having a shower together trick but literally how much shower sex can one have before it becomes boring? We just want to have normal sex.
If you're a man you are probably reading this thinking "that's what all women say" and you are right other married friends with children (without my condition) say the same thing they are too tired to have sex.
To be honest my husband started badgering me about the lack of sex we were having so my natural response was to reach out to my fellow married friends to get some insight. Oddly enough apparently my husband and I are doing ok on the sex front. However I don't think it is fair for me to compare our relationship to others. The fact is I use to give my husband more and now I give him less which means I'm letting the team down. Not only is ITP affecting my lifestyle but it is affecting my husbands as well.
Now let's move on to the more serious subject. I was reading an ITP forum where a few ladies had commented saying their doctor's had told them they should avoid having sex because of their condition. Could you image? Sounds crazy right? however I do understand why this may be an issue. Having sex with low platelets can be at times painful there have been many of times where after the deed I have ended up covered in bruises and I have even had bleeding from you know where. You know sex is an activity however even the most basic form of sex can leave a few marks when you have ITP. Does that mean because of my condition that I should stop having sex? (geez imagine if I told me husband that - yeep). No I don't think so. It just means like everything in my life it just needs to be adjusted because of ITP. If my platelets are low I be more cautious and if they are high then hubby lets' get it on.
Overall be warned: ITP does play a factor in ones sex life not just mentally but physically as well.